It's been a rotten few days, and I guess it's just more fun to blog when something funny happens, or it's been a good day. The truth is I'm miserable. I'm lonely, and I'm often overwhelmed, and the reality has set in that the next 8 months are going to be like this. I mean, I'm sure that every day won't be horrible, but dang my depression is kicking my butt right now. I decided to start taking my prozac in the morning instead of the evening, in hopes that it'll help my mood some. I may end up calling and making an appointment to discuss the dosage and see if I need an increase. I want to give myself a month to really get acclimated to the changes and see if I really need it.

Seth has been missing Daddy a lot the past few days. He is asking for him about once an hour. My heart breaks every time he asks for him. Normally Seth is a Mommy's boy, but the past few days he really wants James. It makes me sad to see his tears as he says that he wants Daddy to come home.

It's funny how time goes in a child's mind. To Seth, Daddy has been gone "forever" already. He doesn't quite get that it hasn't been a long time yet. We tried to prepare the boys for James leaving by telling them that Daddy was going to be gone for 8 months, and that it's a really long time. Well, Seth thinks it's already been a really long time and doesn't understand why we can't go pick up Daddy yet. Josh has been learning about time, days of the week, and months. He's starting to understand a little bit better but I have no clue how to explain it to a newly turned 3 year old. James was nice yesterday and sent us a video, so the boys can watch the video each night. The kids returned the favor and made a video that we sent to James today.

I put Trey down early tonight. He was obviously ready for bed. He is the polar opposite of his brothers, and needs lots of sleep to be pleasant. It seemed so foreign for me to put a boy to bed before 7pm. It sure is nice though! Maybe he wore himself out with his many attempts to get into the bathroom today. He is persistant, and loves the dog water bowl and the toilet paper. He discovered today how much fun it is to unroll the toilet paper and put it in the dog bowl today. Fun times!

Well Sethers has pushed his way behind me in my chair, which tells me he is starting to get tired and needs snuggles. I will try to blog again soon.